Let go of fear and find out

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Many people feel that their inability to be who they are started in their own minds and beliefs. In all the years I have been in mental health counseling, I have never, not even once, found that to be a true statement.

The thoughts and beliefs that people have about themselves started when someone else made them…

Rest is good for the soul

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Sometimes we can be so tired in our mind and body that only a complete break from our everyday life will reset us. Earlier this year, I was able to have one of those resets.

My family and I went for four days to what is called the Missouri Breaks in Montana. It is several hours north of where we live. There are almost no people and definitely no Internet, cell, or television service of any kind. The land is a high prairie with pine trees, juniper bushes, and sagebrush.

The sky is magnificently big and seems to go on…


And begins on the inside

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I call it the happiness hamper. The place where you go to dig through everything, hoping to find the one you think will make you happy. Trying on different ones to see which will make you happy at that moment. All of these kinds of happiness are dependent on someone or something else.

True happiness can…


Speak to yourself

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Your brain will only believe what you tell it is true.

Your brain is not an artificial intelligence. It is a taught repeater. It does not make up things on its own.

The information that is taken into your brain is what your brain will put back out.

And anything that is put into your brain by either yourself or others with belief that it is true, your brain will believe it is true. It does not matter whether it is actually true or not. …

Feed your body and brain

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As I have written about many times, vitamin D is essential to healthy mental health. In Montana where I live and practice, vitamin D deficiency is a very normal occurrence for people, and for some people, a complete lack of vitamin D is not uncommon.

Many studies have been done over the years that directly relate increased depression to a lack of vitamin D in the body. …


Give yourself some grace

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Most of us have been taught that we should give grace to others in all myriad of circumstances. We should be kind and courteous to others. We should show mercy, forgiveness, and tolerance to others. We should be considerate and thoughtful of other people’s feelings, sorrows, and tragedies.

How often do we extend grace to ourselves?

Creating a peaceful space

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Many times, we find ourselves pushed to the edge and beyond it emotionally and mentally, and yes physically. Pushed by those who expect us to help them or in some cases enable them to solve or avoid their own problems.

Children who come with presenting issues that they make seem like life or death and expect us to solve them immediately. Bosses who bring their own stress…


And the most important

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There are three words—acknowledgment, acceptance, and change—on the road to recovery. Change cannot come without the other two.

However, it is the word and act of acceptance that most of my clients find the hardest to see, say, and do. Acceptance means that one has to accept fully that what has happened to them to this point…


Being afraid of what happens next

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However, when we start working on that change and they start to think about what that change is going to look like, their fear can sometimes keep them from making forward progress.

When we have trauma, we have developed responses to that trauma since the trauma started. With every subsequent trauma, we have more responses added.

All of these responses shape how we think, how we react, and how we live.



Love is for always

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In the way you watch at the window waiting for me to arrive home
coming out to walk me in when the path is icy
flowers for no particular reason except that you love me
and my favorite wines that just appear

The special nickname reserved only for me
and I love you spoken many times over each day
letting me watch a series over and over without complaint
and finding tear-jerker movies for us to share

Reaching out to me with texts and calls throughout the day
and understanding my need for silence after stressful work
making sure I have all…

Deborah Horton

Deborah Horton Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, Writer, Wife, Mom, Entrepreneur, Painter, Nerd, Human

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